For the Love of GOD, Can we change the conversation.

The sky is blue, they say. Is it really though? It is generally a shade of blue, even purple, or pink, or even at times a mixture. There are nights that it is orange and yellow, or times when cotton candy fills the sky (that is my favorite,) where the pink and blues blend to form the perfect cotton candy texture that you can almost taste. SO REALLY, Is it JUST blue? What I am trying to say is that the sky isn’t always blue, it is a gradient of colors, ever flowing, ever moving into different shades of other colors. It is a representation of the way sunlight interacts with the gases and particles in the atmosphere. (I looked that up 😆) BUT, we tend to see mostly blue. However, when the sunlight has to pass through more of the atmosphere, say at sunset, we see an array of colors that is truly a sight to see. (literally, we all tend to watch the sun set for this reason) SO, what I am saying is, depending on the atmosphere, the gases, and the amount of sunlight, we will see different colors in the sky. People, dare I say humans, are generally the same way. Depending on our atmosphere (our environment), the gases (no not that kind of gas lol; the negative in our surroundings), and the sunlight (the positive that affects us,) we reflect a different color, emotion, or mood. Together, the atmosphere, the gases, and the amount of sunlight paint the colors we see throughout our skies. SLIGHT changes in that reflect a different color. SO, aren’t we technically the same way? We are the reflection of all we absorb and our emotions and energy are the reaction or the “colors” of our well-being. Our mental health is a gradient scale, always changing, always a reflection of what surrounds us and affects us. Then why do we talk about it like it’s simply black or white? We don’t ask the sky to change its’ colors to simply stay blue, as we know it, but we can ask ourselves to only see black and white when it comes to mental health, knowing it is made up of a kaleidoscope of colors continuously changing with every turn. We are either “normal” or “crazy,” there is NO in between. But, what about the millions of literally everyone on the planet that struggles with their mental health at some point in their life, or even the fact that we ALL have mental health to begin with. SO, then shouldn’t our mental health be talked about more on a regular basis? Dare I say, talked about as a norm of just simply being human. Our minds are sponges, taking in all that is around us, our experiences, our people, and our environment. Then, technically, since we are ALL reactionary to our surroundings, and we are ALL affected by something, we ALL experience mental health every damn day.  SO, I guess, it is safe to say we ALL HAVE MENTAL HEALTH. SO, for the love of GOD, can we talk about it like it’s a part of all of us?

You see, mental health isn’t an abnormal anomaly that makes people act out of character. It is a part of being human. Even more so nowadays with knowing and seeing everything that is going on around the entire world. It is basically the same thing as saying “MIND HEALTH.” If you have a mind, though there are some I question, often, then you have mental health. PERIOD. The term, “you are mental,” really doesn’t make any sense, you see. You are technically saying, “you are mindful.” Don’t you think? The word mental relates to anything connected to thinking, reasoning, or the brain. SO, telling someone they are mental, is really saying they are capable of thinking, reasoning, and have a brain. AM I MISSING SOMETHING HERE?? Why was this word ever turned negative, you ask? Society. Society saw anything that affected the brain as a NEGATIVE. They claimed the word mental and turned it against us. But, that is mostly in the past. Though, it still lives amongst us. It still gets blurted out as a dumb contradiction aimed to hurt. I believe, we can change that. I believe with my whole heart that the mental health community will change drastically in my lifetime. And, I truly hope to not only see it, but to be apart of it.

SO, ask yourself. If the one thing we know to be blue, is really an array of colors, than what we THINK is simply black and white CAN ALSO be an array of colors TOO. The earth was thought to be flat at one point people! The point is, if you think that mental health has the stigma, you are wrong. It is society that holds it, right in its’ hand, and has the control of where it is placed. WE HOLD IT. And, if we hold it, then we, as a society, have the ability to drop it; take all that is wrapped up in the word STIGMA and let it go, crush it, stop using it. The more we use it, the more it keeps its’ role in our society. It is a negative word, historically used for a physical mark that separated those who were not the same as the majority. It is a negative word that is being used to create change. But, positive change will never come with the use of a negative word. It only fuels it. So, when society shoves STIGMA down your throat, cough that sh*t back up at them LOL. It has no place here. Here, we don’t say “break the stigma,” we say “normalize the conversation,” or “create acceptance,” or “build understanding,” or even “mark this B up.” (If you read my earlier blogs, you know what I’m saying!!) Let us change the conversation around mental health, and watch it grow before our very eyes. I truly hope you understand what I am trying to say here. It is so very important if we are ever to see change in the mental health community in our lifetime.

Change can begin with a drop of impact. It can begin as one single solitary conversation. Let it begin with US.

It is true that change requires more than just talking points and picket signs. It requires hard truths and soft acceptance. And, it is also true that things that are worth anything, will always come at a price. It just depends on what we are willing to give, or frankly, what we are willing to give up. Even if that means giving up the only words we’ve ever known, and starting over.

SO, When someone commits a cruel act against others and it flashes across the screen “SUSPECT HAD MENTAL HEALTH ISSUES,” instead of thinking they must be “mental” wish that they would use different terminology that doesn’t demonize everyone that has had any minor mental health struggle.. Ask yourself, why mental health has become so awful that we only use it negatively. Ask yourself, why there really is an on-going mental health crisis? Maybe people wouldn’t feel so awful about themselves if we, as a society, made them feel like they are more normal and not a “crazy person.” Yes, severe mental health illnesses will affect the way people think, and that can have some serious consequences, but please change the way you talk about basic mental health on a broad level. Because, most of society has been affected by it in some way, and we aren’t ALL doing these awful things. The small handful of people that do are more than struggling with their mental health. They have a SEVERE illness and need SERIOUS help or early intervention to prevent these things from happening. And yes, interventions should be created to protect people from the danger they pose, but they should also support those who want help and clearly do not pose a threat to themselves or others.

 I’ll be the first to say that it totally sucks seeing those BIG BOLD words run across the screen whenever there is a terrible tragedy that takes over the news. It isn’t mental health committing these heinous actions, it is malevolence. You are not that, right? Good. I didn’t think so. So, I think it’s safe to say mental health isn’t so black and white after all. It isn’t Crazy and Normal. It is a gradient of colors, all created from our world around us, and how it affects us. It is a sliding scale or simply a spectrum of all different shades of mental health. Our skies can be blue💙, purple💜, red❤️, orange🧡, yellow💛, and for sure pink🩷 (in my world.) WE ALL HAVE OUR COLORS. WE ALL HAVE OUR OWN MENTAL HEALTH. So, if we know this, why can’t we change the way we talk and approach mental health? Oh yeah, that’s right, it’s much easier to paint a picture black and white. 

Thank you for coming to my TED talk LOL. I sincerely hope you take something from my piece today and go leave a mark on this world. (which is where “mark this B up” comes from) We can be the change we want to see in this world. We simply just need to begin a new conversation and come up with new ideas and specifically new words surrounding mental health. My wish for you is that you know that you are not alone, and that your mental health struggles are felt by most people on this planet. I wish for you to openly talk about them and allow yourself to feel normal. You are not alone in this. We ALL have our seasons of mental health moments. It is a BASIC topic. So, let’s be “BASIC B’S together! I will, if you will LOL. It truly is OK if you struggle, but it is not OK to do it alone. I got you girl. I see YOU. Here, you have a village.